


Travels through the Alphabet with Mai

by Alabaster86



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-20
Updated: 2013-09-21
Packaged: 2017-12-15 13:11:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 15,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/849929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alabaster86/pseuds/Alabaster86
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of drabbles/one-shots featuring Mai, and occasionally Maiko, one for every letter of the alphabet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Apples and Absences

**Apples and Absences**

Mai wandered off, away from the garden's stone path, checking over her shoulder every few moments, making certain that no one followed. Once she felt secure, Mai stared down at her feet and noticed the scruffy bits of dead, brown grass marring the expanse of green. That would not have been tolerated in Ursa's day.

_But Ursa's gone._

A pang of loss hit the girl and her chest felt tight and achy. Ursa had been so good to Mai.

Ty Lee's laughter and Azula's imperious voice faded more and more until they were nothing but whispers caressing Mai's ears. She headed toward a copse and lost herself inside. In her hand was an apple, fresh plucked from the garden's lone apple tree. Its red skin, smooth and unblemished was almost too pretty to ruin, but Mai took a bite anyway and savored the slightly tart taste. Juice rolled down her throat and dribbled onto her chin. The thirteen year old scrubbed at the mess and wiped pale, long fingers off on her tunic.

Settling down on the soft ground, not so dried out by the powerful sun as those more exposed parts of the garden, Mai took her time with the rest of the apple. Each one she ate from that tree was both joy and sorrow and brought back with poignant clarity the day Zuko had saved her from Azula's burning apple prank. She'd liked him before. She loved him from that moment on.

Mai snatched the fruit in secret and hid the apples inside her tunic. Ty Lee would only give her a knowing glance and speak cheerfully of true love and reunions, while reading her aura. Azula would mock her banished brother; try to make him small and worthless in Mai's eyes. And Mai would stand by silent and still, no expression on her face but burning inside. They'd seen her take an apple once. Mai wouldn't let them see again.

Neither affected her; not Ty Lee's optimism, not Azula's scathing assault on Zuko's character and abilities. Mai had her own thoughts about the boy she loved. She'd grieved his leaving and continued to mourn his absence. She imagined what his life might be like, how he might change, what he looked like. None of that mattered really. He was still Zuko and he would always be her Zuko. But thinking about the prince, trying in her small way to experience what he was going through, kept him close.

Mai's mother and father urged the girl to forget and focus on becoming a well behaved noblewoman who would attract many marriage offers. That was their solution. Mai silently seethed at them too. They didn't understand the depth of her feelings or the wound that Zuko's departure had left. Then, they didn't understand much about Mai at all.

The apple was almost finished. Mai took the final bite and closed her eyes, picturing Zuko's face, his eyes, recalling his voice and words he'd once said. It was all she had left and Mai treasured her memories as a miser treasured his gold. She would not relinquish them for anything.

Breaking apart the apple core, Mai dug out the tiny brown seeds and held them in her palm. It was hard to believe that such an insignificant thing could quicken and grow and become another apple tree. Worming her way back out of the copse she blinked in the bright sun. As she walked, she spread the seeds and wished that one might grow


	2. Buds and Breasts and Babies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai's adjusts to her body's changes.

_**Part 2: Buds and Breasts and Babies** _

They seemed to develop overnight. Mai stretched in her bed and yawned before putting her feet on the red carpet. She felt different somehow and stood before the full length mirror examining her reflection.

"Oh," she uttered, her mouth making a small circle.

With trepidation, the thirteen year old ran her hands up and over her chest. There were small bumps there, small but definite and noticeable. She flushed and dropped her hands quickly. Darting into the bathroom she cleaned up and dressed for school.

"Maybe no one else will see," she murmured, wondering why she felt embarrassed and ashamed.

Ty Lee and Azula, both a year younger, were already more developed and seemed to carry their breasts with confidence and indifference respectively. And they were natural. All women had them. And men seemed to like them.

Downstairs she sat in the dining room and waited for breakfast. Bored, she twiddled her fingers in her lap. The spring sunshine poured in through the large windows, bouncing off dishes and wall sconces, making pretty patterns on the walls. Mai cleared her throat when her parents entered the room.

"Good morning," Akira said with a smile.

Ever since she had become pregnant and it had stuck, after many miscarriages and much heartbreak, her humour had improved. Her hands hovered over her belly constantly and she was always touching and crooning and giving it sweet little smiles. Mai felt jealous and hated herself for feeling anything so petty.

"Morning," Mai said, talking more to her tea cup than to her mother.

Hoshi sat at the head of the table and presided over breakfast. He directed most of his glances at his wife and touched her hand with great tenderness. Mai felt that surge of jealousy again and bit the inside of her mouth. She picked at her food and thought about her chest. She felt warmth creep into her face and wished that the day could be over already so she could crawl back into her soft, warm bed.

"Mai?" She jerked her head up and stared at her mother. "You're distracted. What's the matter?"

"What makes you think something's the matter? Maybe I'm just bored."

"You're always bored, Mai. I can tell the difference."

Since when had the woman become so intuitive? Was it some weird mother-to-be trickery?

"It's nothing; just stuff."

Hoshi quirked an eyebrow but kept out of the conversation. Teenage girls were a frightening, alien species.

"Come on, Mai. You've got time for a little walk in the garden with me before school." Her tone was a warning. The girl had no choice.

~~~~0000~~~~

"Thirteen is a difficult age."

Mai sighed and rolled her eyes.

"I'm thirteen; I know that already."

Akira took Mai's attitude in her stride and laughed. She felt magnanimous and motherly and full of love.

"You'll experience a lot of changes. Maybe you're experiencing some now."

"Please, don't, _don't_ give me the talk."

Mai flopped down on a bench and glanced sidelong at her mother. She took in the protruding stomach and the larger than usual breasts. They were womanly and full and Mai felt like a little girl in comparison.

It was a perfect spring morning. Everything was in bud and the garden seemed full to bursting with life, humming like a well maintained machine. A tree branch bobbed with the breeze. It nudged Mai's shoulder and she turned to watch. She thought it looked like a dancer keeping time with the music, every move smooth and graceful. Reaching out she pulled a bud from its place in the grayish bark and rolled it about in her hand. It was smooth and soft and comprised of silky layers. In a few short days the other buds would open and the garden would transform. It was miraculous. The analogy to her own budding was not lost on Mai.

"Mai, just tell me." Akira examined her daughter with equal intensity. "I see," she finally stated with a smile.

"You can see?" For just a moment, Mai looked horrified. Then she smoothed out her features and put the bored mask back on. "Um, yeah, guess I'm a bit behind the other girls."

"There's no exact time; everyone really is different, Mai."

_Then why do you treat me as though I'm like every other girl?_

"Yeah, I guess." She crossed her arms over her chest. "I'll get used to it." For a brief moment she wondered what Zuko might think. But he wasn't there to see. He might _never_ see. She blushed anyway and chewed on her lip. "I'll be late for school."

"All right; go on then."

Mai walked to the gate, turned and gave her mother a little wave. Akira smiled and watched her daughter leave. Both felt a strange mixture of wistfulness and joy.


	3. Carve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai carves Zuko's name.

_**Part 3: Carve** _

Mai pricked the tip of her thumb with a blade and watched as one fat, red drop emerged from below the skin. She allowed it to hover there for a moment before sticking the appendage in her mouth. The metallic taste lingered on her tongue. She liked to test her blades that way, anoint them in blood.

Tall for her age, frail looking, she stood in her bedroom wearing nothing but a thin nightgown. It was late and the streets of Capitol City were dark. Mai had flung the shutters back, letting in soft night air. The moon hung heavy in the sky, almost full and surrounded by shimmering stars, like a monarch with adoring subjects. A lantern burned on her bedside table, illuminating the room with its yellow light. Her wardrobe door was open wide and she pondered where she would carve his name. The girl wished that she could carve it on her heart, slice through skin and tissue and bone to reach the thick muscle before making delicate incisions, beautiful characters that represented his name. She wished that the prince bore her name somewhere too, twin carvings, a link of blood and pain that joined them together across time and distance and change.

But the wardrobe would have to do, somewhere inconspicuous so that her mother did not notice. Mai removed neatly folded tunics and skirts and dresses, putting them down on her bed. She pulled out one of the shelves and turned it upside down, exposing the rougher, unfinished side. Her lips drawn tight with concentration and her pale eyes narrowed, Mai put knife to wood, making the first stroke with some hesitation. The wood was unresisting and the blade bit into it easily, like a kitchen knife sliced tender, juicy meat. Her confidence grew.

Little shavings of wood curled up and Mai blew them aside. When she was done, the girl traced the carving with her index finger, lingering over each character. Somehow, she felt closer to Zuko, having his name in her room with her, where she slept, where she read, where she threw her knives and where she dreamed.

With a sigh, Mai returned the clothes, making certain they were as neat as before. She closed the wardrobe door with a gentle click and headed over to the window. The night was her time to be alone and silent, no mother or father or princess to disturb her thoughts. She craved the fall of dark, felt safe and free beneath its velvet cloak.

She smiled and thought about other places she might leave her mark, little carvings here and there throughout the room, making it _hers_ more than theirs. The plan was a simple one but it made her happy and happiness was hard to come by.


	4. Daughters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai contemplates what it means to be and to have a daughter.

_**Part 4: Daughters** _

There was a line of them, going back through time, an endless cycle of daughters and mothers and mothers and daughters. Mai wondered what the beginning was, who the first mother was and what she was like. And Mai wondered how she would fit into this string of womanhood now that she had her own tiny, new baby girl.

Giving birth was messy and excruciating but like so many women had calmly informed Mai, that pain faded with surprising ease. She was left with joy and wonder at what she and Zuko had created together, a love so profound she was shaken to her very core, and fear.

"What if I ruin you?" The young wife of the Fire Lord peered down into the bassinet. "What if I do it all wrong?" She tucked ebony hair behind her ears and sighed. Tears stung her eyes. The baby slept, fists tight, little pink lips moving. Careful not to wake her, Mai stroked her cheek. Her skin was softer than the best sheets, the freshest flower petal, their cat's coat. The infant tensed for a moment, as though Mai's touch had invaded her dreams. Then she relaxed once more and Mai withdrew her hand.

She slipped out of the nursery, leaving the door ajar, before retiring to the rooms she shared with Zuko. The rooms were adjoining, only a door separating one from the other. But Mai found herself keeping her daughter with her at night. That way she could check on the baby with ease. She found herself attuned to every breath, every movement, every beat of the little heart.

Exhausted herself, she slid down onto the sofa and allowed herself the luxury of closing her eyes. The peace did not last long, however. A soft knock, quiet but somehow still insistent, forced Mai up and over to the door; her mother stood on the other side, smiling indulgently.

"You're tired, dear. I can see it in your eyes."

"Well, yeah, new baby; they're tiring."

Mai wanted to shut the door again or pin to the wall the guard who had let Akira by. Another part of her wanted to lean on the woman, ask for advice, listen to her stories about when Mai was an infant. She settled for moving aside so that the woman could enter before returning to her position on the sofa.

"She's sleeping? Of course she's sleeping; otherwise she'd be with you." Akira sat primly beside her daughter. "I can stay over for a few days if you want. I remember what it's like."

Though the offer seemed genuine enough, Mai couldn't help but wonder if her mother had some kind of ulterior motive. Their relationship had most always consisted of reproofs from one and sarcastic retorts from the other, silences and disappointment, slamming doors and hands thrown up in the air.

She didn't really want her mother underfoot, interfering either. But wasn't it time to put all that aside now? Wasn't it time to begin anew? There was a young, unique life to consider, untainted and pure as a human being could be. Was it fair to deprive her daughter of a grandmother? Was it fair to deprive Akira of the chance to make amends in her convoluted way?

_I'm not blameless._

For years now, Mai head relegated her parents to the role of 'villains'. They'd made crucial errors, tried to make her fit, mold her into something she was not and would never be. That was difficult to forgive.

_But not impossible; I'll make mistakes too and I would want Miyako to forgive me._

"Mai, did you hear me?" Akira reached out and put a hand on her daughter's arm. She left it there for a moment, giving her daughter a squeeze.

The small display of affection shocked Mai out of her reverie. "Yeah, yeah I heard. You could come every day for a few days, you know, take over once in awhile. Zuko helps a lot, but he's…"

"He's got responsibilities that won't wait. "

"Mmmm, but he does his best. He wants to be a good father. He _is_ a good father. When I watch them together, it's…" No word could accurately describe what Mai felt when she observed Zuko with Miyako; it touched her like nothing else ever had.

"Let me help a bit. I wasn't …" The older woman sighed. "I wasn't the best mother to you. I can see that now, Mai. But you've grown into a lovely woman, strong and independent and smart. I _am_ proud."

"Oh." It was all Mai could utter, but those three simple words shook her world, her perspective, shifting everything on its axis. She had wanted to hear them since as far back as she could recall. Her lower lip trembled a bit and she wanted to cry. "Let's go see the baby."

She stood up and waited for Akira, leading her into the nursery, standing back while her mother cooed and crooned and smiled at the infant. Mai could hear the love in the woman's voice, the determination to do right. That was enough.


	5. Evil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai contemplates the nature of evil.

**Part 5: Evil**

Mai could feel it uncurl inside her sometimes, unwinding slowly like a drowsy serpent, drowsy but eager to slither out and show itself. Everyone had darkness in them somewhere. Some people hid it better or _controlled_ it better than others. And there were those who embraced evil wholeheartedly, succumbed to it, lived it. But evil was there inside everyone, laying in wait, anticipating a slip up, a desperate situation, unquenchable anger, anything that might call it out.

Her darkness was often awake around Azula. The princess could be cruel, seemed to enjoy hurting others, making them squirm. And sometimes, not always, Mai enjoyed the sight. The girl's confidence, her strength, her intelligence, her power, were all compelling and if people got caught up in Azula's web somehow, suffered her wrath, well, that was hardly Mai's concern.

Dai Li agents could be so terrified of Azula that they almost wet themselves and that was amusing. Azula's coup provided the most fun Mai had experienced for years. In fact, Azula's stop in Omashu to recruit her was just what she had needed. In Omashu she was dying of the dullness, withering away, a tree without sun or soil or water. At least with Azula, she could escape the watchful eyes of her parents and their stupid expectations. She could defy them and use Azula as an excuse. As a young girl, Azula and the palace had been her only way out. In Omashu, it was no different.

Mai ignored the dozens of cruel acts perpetrated by her princess. She went along, carried by the swell of adventure and possibility. And the people were nameless anyway, unknown to Mai. Was the act of standing by, letting something happen, was that evil in and of itself? Mai wasn't certain and pushed such thoughts away. She was no philosopher, just a teenage girl trying to get by.

It wasn't until their confrontation at the Boiling Rock Prison that Mai saw Azula as truly evil. When the princess spat the words "No, you miscalculated. You should have feared me more," her eyes blazing with fury and the need to grind Mai down to nothing, Mai _knew_ evil's face. And she never wanted to see it again.


	6. Fetish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko has a thing for Mai's dark hair and pale skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks to Private Fire for her help with the fetish idea.

_**Part 6: Fetish** _

 

Her skin, creamy white, alabaster and her hair, midnight tresses, soft as down and shinier than the finest jewels, had always been admired. Mai's mother had fretted about too much sun. That showed just how little she really knew her daughter. Mai avoided the sun as much as possible out of principle. The night and the dark were far more compelling. Nighttime held secrets and nighttime permitted so much more.

The finest soaps and shampoos were always available to Mai and from a young age, she had been encouraged to keep that hair brushed and smooth, at least fifty strokes every night before bed. It was a ritual that Mai enjoyed, despite the fact that her mother had been the one to initiate it.

So her skin and her hair were like valuables, physical traits that others envied, traits her parents might use in the bargaining to find a husband for their daughter. Mai didn't care about that, didn't want some stupid man chosen by her mother and father.

Zuko was different. He loved that pale skin and that black hair too, the contrast between the two, the softness of each. He was obsessed with them, focused on them during lovemaking, twisting bits of hair about his fingers, rubbing the strands, biting her skin, sucking on it, leaving red marks. And Mai was captivated by his fetish.

She loved nothing better than the buildup to sex, those minutes before when she and Zuko kissed and held each other and touched secret places and she let down her hair, allowed it to spill across her back like a dark wave. Every time, _every_ time, Zuko sucked in his breath and stared, captivated for a moment, before reaching out and running his hands through the thick strands. And every time Mai untied her sash and undid clasps and buttons, letting her robes drop to the floor, a puddle of burgundies and blacks, he gasped.

"Oh, Mai," he would whisper.

He inhaled the sight of her, vital to him as air. And as Zuko ran his fingers along arms and legs, remarking at their smoothness, pinching occasionally and biting gently, watching the red appear, glaring and strange against the white, he became more and more aroused.

Catching sight of her in the corridor sometimes, raven bangs against pale forehead, long pale fingers protruding from wide sleeves, Zuko leapt on her, his need overwhelming, and dragged her willing to whatever empty room was nearest.

His desire, the power a flick of her hair could have, exhilarated Mai. Never had she appreciated her mother's beauty tips more.


	7. Graduation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai does not want to be at her graduation ceremony.

_**Part 7: Graduation** _

She hated the fuss. Mai preferred to blend into the background like she always did rather than endure the graduation ceremony. The Royal Fire Academy for Girls was the nation's most elite school and her parents had insisted she attend. She was a year older than the other graduates. That was her parents' fault as well. They kept her at home a year just so that she and Princess Azula would be in the same class.

"You'll grow even closer that way," her mother had reasoned in that way of hers, a way that allowed for no argument.

Mai had no choice but to acquiesce. She was not paying the tuition. She had no control over her own life. So for a year, the raven haired girl lounged about, reading books that she snuck out of her parents' library or purchased cheap from vendors in Capitol City. Mai threw her blades in her room and in the garden. She walked and she walked some more. She moped and she thought about Zuko. She stagnated like still water in a pond, became sluggish and slow, little life flowing through her.

It was almost a relief to begin classes at the academy. If nothing else, it would provide a different kind of boredom. She was a good student, not because she studied hard but because she absorbed the information and remembered it all. She never gave much of it any real thought. None of it seemed to apply to her life anyway, so what was the point?

Azula threw herself into her studies, making certain that she was top of the class in everything. And no one dared provide any real competition for her. Some of the other girls were just as bright, more talented in some things, but held back, terrified of the princess's wrath.

So, two years passed and now graduation was upon her. Mai stood on the small podium, dressed in her school uniform, hair perfect, face perfect, and observed the mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles who beamed with pride.

Her mother had been in a tizzy all day, excited by the prospect of that certificate with Mai's name on it. She could boast about Mai's accomplishment to her lady friends. Her daughter was cultured and educated now, a fine catch for any high born young man.

_I wish Uncle Katashi was here._

He couldn't make the ceremony but had sent Mai a gift, a set of blades, gleaming, lovely things, forged by an expert, perfect. And Mai loved him for the gesture, for his acknowledgment of her true self. His sister, Mai's mother, disapproved, naturally, but allowed Mai to keep them. Family harmony had its own value.

_He understands me. He isn't trying to sell me off to the highest bidder. He wants me to be happy._

Staring out at the crowd, Mai realized that she wasn't. And no amount of polite applause, no amount of certificates would change that. Her life loomed, an endless series of lonely, dull days.

_Maybe I'll join the military. They can't stop me._

But she didn't want that either. Mai wasn't sure what she wanted. But she was certain about whom.


	8. Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai contemplates what she's gotten herself into while out with Azula and Ty Lee, hunting Zuko and Iroh and the Avatar.

_**Part 8: Hunt** _

She had weapons and she had prey. Mai could call her sortie with Azula and Ty Lee what she wanted, anything to make the whole thing seem somehow better. But it _was_ a hunt. Going after the Avatar didn't bother Mai. She didn't know the boy. She didn't care about him.

Iroh she recalled from her childhood. The memories were vague ones; a fat man, laughing and friendly but with sorrow underneath it all. Zuko loved him. That she remembered vividly, the prince's enthusiasm anytime his uncle spent time with him.

_Substitute father._

Mai was astute enough to see that. Ozai was cold and aloof, disapproving. Naturally, Zuko would be drawn to Iroh's warmth. They were a team now, she supposed, running _from_ something, _to_ something; she did not know.

And Zuko, well, he'd occupied a corner of her mind, a special corner, one where she kept the small amount of good things in her life, since the first time she laid her eyes on him. Three years was a long time not to see someone that you cared for. And Mai would admit that she did not think about Zuko constantly, or even every day. But his spectre was there in the background and when upset or stressed or contemplative, she recalled those times spent with the prince and wondered about his life now. More than anything, she yearned for his return.

Part of her was excited to be chasing Zuko. He was somewhere nearby, within a day's travel perhaps. But what would she do if they captured him? What would she say? Would she keep her face impassive, show no interest, harden her heart to reduce the probability of pain? Would she grab hold of him and run?

All these thoughts Mai kept hidden behind her outer face, the face that showed nothing to anyone. Those able to peel that one away, like a bandage off a wound, would see more, so much more. Princess Azula was bright, frighteningly so, and she sensed some of Mai's lingering attachment to Zuko.

"I hope you'll be ready to use those." Azula indicated the blades that Mai was sharpening.

The raven haired girl kept a small whetstone as part of her gear. Dull blades were useless after all and the repetitive motion, back and forth along the steel, drowned out internal chaos.

Mai replied without looking up. "Not a problem." Her heart beat a little faster, though.

"Good; I have a lead. We're leaving now, on the mongoose dragons." The princess tossed her head, "Let's go."

Sighing, Mai wrapped the stone before tucking it into a tiny pouch and slipping that into one of several hidden pockets in her clothing. She headed towards Azula and Ty Lee and the huge animals that they would ride. They were eager, stomping their feet and snorting.

"Come on, Mai. It'll be fun."

"You think _everything's_ fun, Ty Lee."

Once aboard her mount, thundering along between the two other girls, Mai began to enjoy herself. The rush of air through her hair, against her body and the speed of the animals exhilarated her. She crouched down low, becoming one with the creature. Excited to be on the move, the mongoose dragon pushed itself, stretching muscles and sinew almost past the point of endurance.

Mai forgot about Ty Lee and Azula. She forgot about what might be at the end of their little journey. She forgot about any decisions she might have to make. And she just lived in that moment, enjoying the hunt, dismissing any thoughts of their prey.


	9. Invisible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai often feels invisible.

_**Part 9: Invisible** _

Her parents were in the living room, having a disagreement about something stupid, a party perhaps or what to spend on an area rug for the dining room. The content of the argument did not matter. The fact that they were occupied _did._

Mai, seven years old, slipped into the room on tiptoe and splayed herself flat against the wall. It was a game she played, seeing how long she could stand there and not be noticed. With all the will her young mind could conjure up, Mai melted into the background. Her red nightgown blended with the red curtains, her hair, the colour of deepest night, matched parts of the tapestry that hung down almost to the floor. She closed her eyes and held her breath and made like she did not exist.

When she opened them again, darkness cloaked the room and she was alone. It took a moment for her eyes to adjust. She stayed close to the wall, keeping one hand on its surface, and found her way to the door. Silent as a cat stalking its prey, the girl made her way upstairs and into her bedroom. Once under the smooth, cool sheet, she curled up into a tight ball and tried to disappear.

~~~~0000~~~~

The men talked at one end of the room, their voices rising and falling in a rhythm Mai found soothing. At the other end, the women gathered, high pitched titters and shocked gasps punctuating the gossip they disguised as polite conversation. Mai sat on a chair, her legs dangling a few inches above the carpet. She resisted the urge to swing them, not wanting one of those pursed lipped glares from her mother. Instead, she gazed down at the pattern in the carpet, following the trail of gold thread as it made flowers and leaves and more flowers and more leaves. The design was intricate and Mai found herself almost completely absorbed.

But some of the words made it through. Marriage and children seemed to be all that occupied the women while the men discussed the state of the nation and the war. How could they be so separate? How did they manage to get together in the bedroom, their couplings a series of grunts and gasps, sweat soaked and messy, when they were so very different? Mai thought of her own parents and their fervent desire to make another baby, a _boy_. There had been a few pregnancies; they failed within two months, ending in bloody robes and bloody sheets and cries ripped from somewhere deep inside her mother.

The little girl, ten now, felt alone there in that crowded room. And she was hungry too. Glancing about, making certain that no one looked her way, Mai hopped off the chair and crept out of the room. She headed for the kitchen, drawn by the smells and the brusque, straightforward talk. Sneaking some food, eating and licking her fingers as she walked, Mai wandered back to the party. No one had noticed her absence. She didn't have to pretend invisibility any longer. Practice had made perfect.

So Mai left, heading outside to the lantern lit garden. The party became nothing but faint murmurs, water flowing over pebbles, something _more_ distant and _more_ separate. She walked the paths, enjoying the breeze and the shadows and the encroaching darkness. Mai found a bench and sat, staring up at the sky. The stars, tiny pricks of light, were unreachable. But Mai felt more connection to them than to the people inside.


	10. Joy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai finds joy in different things.

_**Part 10: Joy** _

So many of the other girls grinned and giggled together, finding delight in things that Mai took no interest in. Sometimes she wondered if there was something missing inside her, some essential piece that would make her like most of the other students at the Royal Fire Academy for Girls.

Her mother labeled her 'surly, ''disinterested', 'cynical' and 'sarcastic'; different labels for different situations. She'd certainly never called Mai a 'bundle of joy' or 'a pleasure to be around'. There were sighs on both sides; frustration, boredom, irritation.

"Would it kill you to smile, dear?" Akira meant well, somewhere deep down. She wanted Mai to be happy, yes, but she figured that happiness would be easier attained if Mai fit the standard mold. And maybe she was right. But never did she encourage her daughter's differences and rarely did she try to understand the complex girl that lived most of her life inside her own head.

"It might," Mai would answer, ducking her head to hide a smirk.

Smirking, now _that,_ an _impure_ smile, came much easier to Mai. She stood back and watched people and life march on by and wondered at their behaviour, the things they held dear, what they felt was important. Maybe she was judgmental, standing apart like she did, rolling her eyes, shaking her head. Maybe if she joined in, Mai could assimilate and all her unique thoughts would vanish into the ether.

But she didn't want to assimilate. Mai experienced joy, found it in unlikely places, with unlikely things; the sound her knives made when they sliced the air, soaring straight and true toward their target, the feel of a book in her hands, being transported by a particularly wonderful tale, the shy blush on Zuko's cheeks when he saw her, how the prince's face altered when he favored her with one of his rare and rarer smiles.

She loved the night, the way it disguised things, the cloak of black that she could hide beneath. The comfort of her bed when she was exhausted, the way it cradled her and soothed her to sleep, the smells of her favorite foods and easing into a warm, perfumed bath; all those things brought Mai joy.

And when alone, savoring those pleasures, or with Zuko, she allowed herself a _true_ smile, one that crept up to her eyes and made them sparkle.


	11. Battle of Boiling Rock and Kissable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kill and kiss for the letter 'k'.

_**Battle of Boiling Rock** _

Everything, her entire life it seemed, had come down to this one moment in time. Her love, her skill, the determination that lay beneath her skin of apathy, all of it was laid bare. Facing Azula, facing the princess's power, her one remaining blade in strong, steady fingers, Mai was ready to kill. Some might call it murder. Most would call it treason. But Mai didn't care. Zuko's life was worth anything she might suffer. She was taking a stand, a real stand, maybe for the first time in her life. And damn if it didn't feel good.

The sun beat down on the raven haired girl, harsh and hot. Her blade, sharper than death, glimmered and gleamed. Mai stood still, her entire body prepared for the throw that might, if nothing else, prolong her life, maybe long enough for the war to end and Zuko to become Fire Lord.

But as she was prepared to kill, so Mai was prepared to die. Azula was angrier than Mai had ever seen her. The princess radiated rage like her fire radiated heat. She had skill and flame and lightning at her behest. Mai probably did not stand a chance. But fearless, she held her ground.

~~~~0000~~~~

_**Kissable** _

She kissed him when he pouted and she kissed him when he smiled. She kissed him in closets and corridors, on the throne and in their bed. Mai kissed Zuko inside and outside, at the beach and in the palanquin. She kissed his lips and his cheek and other places too.

She adored his awkwardness and little blushes and loved when he took control. When they were apart, Mai imagined her lips pressed against fire warmed flesh, her own body absorbing the heat, taking it deep inside where it was safe. It became something that she could access later, something to ease the pangs of longing she felt whenever Zuko was away.

Her Fire Lord, her husband, her Zuko was kissable and so much more.


	12. Land and Longing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for 'L'.

**Land and Longing**

The Fire Nation came into sight after two long weeks at sea. A sense of love and remembrance surged through Mai as volcanic peaks and lush tropical forests, black sand beaches and romantic little coves emerged from the ocean's depths. She'd missed it all; though until that very moment, her longing for home had been a hidden, silent thing.

Zuko stood on the deck, staring, always staring, into his future or into his past; Mai was not quite certain.

"There it is." Mai stated the obvious and placed a hand on her lover's arm.

It quivered beneath her. Zuko was so full of turbulent emotions, so worried about the return to both his land and his role as prince of the Fire Nation. He ripped his eyes away from the horizon only with great effort.

"Yeah," he agreed softly. "We'll be on land soon." He searched her eyes for something, some sort of similar anxiety perhaps, or a sign that she was there _for_ him and _with_ him no matter what.

She smiled, a rare enough sight, and Zuko managed a weak one of his own.

Mai knew he'd spent the better part of his three years in exile aboard his ship. Traveling on the sea was like walking and breathing to him now. While she had no trouble on the water, and even enjoyed the brisk air and the brisk breezes, Mai preferred land beneath her feet.

Besides wanting firm ground under her, and her smile grew wider at the thought, her parents' huge house sat empty, waiting for her. The possibilities were endless.

"It'll be all right." Her hand crawled upward until it rested casually on Zuko's cheek. His pain was her pain, though she was good at hiding any outward manifestations. She wanted to make it all go away. But she didn't know how. So standing on her tiptoes, she kissed the smooth skin of his right cheek.

"Do you really think so, Mai?"

"We're in limbo now," she shrugged. "But once we get home and put our feet down on Fire Nation soil, we can begin, _you_ can begin."

Of course, neither she nor Zuko could predict anything that might happen. But they would be home and together and they could get to know each other anew. Meddling parents were out of the picture. She was fifteen, a woman grown, and Zuko a year older. They could make adult decisions and do adult things and revel in their freedom.

Once they walked off the massive Fire Nation ship and their shoes hit the stone of the dock, the future was theirs.


	13. Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As a child, Mai hated morning, but with Zuko it takes on new meaning.

**Morning**

The first light of morning filtered through the shutters, soft and dewy. Mai screwed her eyes shut tight and rolled over, pressing her face deep into her pillow. She didn't want to get up and deal with the day, whatever it might bring. Bed and shuttered darkness was so much more appealing.

She had to get her mask ready, put it on before anyone might see what lay beneath. Covering up all the anger and pain and disdain and disgust was routine now. It was as though she was halved, had two lives, external and internal, one so very different from the other. But still, it took energy to appear that bored and still observe everything keenly.

She rested awhile longer but knew that her mother expected her for breakfast, clean and dressed and proper, no hint of anything turbulent. So with a frustrated sigh, Mai rolled back over and faced the day, literally. She squinted. The sun was already much brighter.

Stepping out of bed, she yawned and stretched and left all her vulnerabilities behind in the sheets. There, draped in dark, alone and asleep, she did not know for certain what showed on her face. Mai imagined that her dreams and nightmares all stamped themselves on her features and should anyone ever enter the room while she was sleeping, her secrets would be secret no longer. But no one ever entered. Her room was her respite, her sanctuary from a life of torpor.

"Ugh," Mai grumbled as she opened the shutters and headed into her private bath.

She got ready with almost alarming alacrity; hair, clothing, a few blades hidden under voluminous sleeves. And just as Mai opened the door her mother called from the bottom of the steps.

Making her entrance like an actor, Mai glided down the stairs, all long-legged grace, and greeted her mother with an eye roll.

"I'm bored already."

~~~~0000~~~~

Zuko tickled her side before placing a kiss on her bare shoulder. Mai raised her head and gave him a smile. She knew he'd been awake for awhile. He looked alert and bright. Waking up was a lot harder for Mai than for Zuko; so he always let her sleep, thinking quietly in bed, touching her with feather light fingers.

"Hey," he said with a grin.

He always beamed when she first awakened, like she was giving him a gift each morning. The raven haired woman imagined that she must look a mess, rumpled, with sleep in the corners of her eyes and drool in the corners of her mouth. But Zuko didn't care; he never had.

"Hey," she said back before covering a yawn.

"Hungry?"

Mai nodded and gazed about the room. The sunlight, warm and yellow bathed their bedchamber. Another day had begun. Nighttime was wonderful, but now Mai loved morning too.


	14. Nostalgia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai studies the portrait of her and Zuko and memories flood back.

**Nostalgia**

Charcoal eyes stared out at Mai from the portrait.

"So young,' she whispered, letting her fingers trace the red painted frame. "So much pain, so much hidden; but there was joy too and discovery. There was sacrifice and there was survival."

The drawing captured Mai and Zuko near the beginning of their journey, soon after Zuko's return to the Fire Nation. Nothing was certain then. Twisted and manipulated, plagued by guilt and confusion, Zuko was a mess. And Mai, she kept him sane. Their moments together were sometimes tumultuous, sometimes filled with quiet anger and sorrow and sometimes filled with exquisite joy; they were some of the finest moments that Mai could recall.

Yes, they were married now, with two children and a circle of friends that offered love and support unconditionally. Their love had blossomed, their passion did not waver. But sometimes, when Mai stared deep into those charcoal eyes, the eyes of their youth, she longed to go back, even for a day or an hour.

The intensity and stupidity of young love was an intoxicating experience. Everything was ahead of them then, a mysterious void of future days. Back then, while the artist rendered their likenesses with such thrilling accuracy, their lives might have taken many turns. Back then anything was possible. So many milestones, so many wonders were yet to be experienced.

"It still is and there still are," Zuko reminded her. Wrapping strong arms about her waist, he tugged her close. "I know what you're thinking. And Agni, I was a mess in those days."

"Oh, and how do you know that?" She hadn't even heard him come in. She was that preoccupied.

"Because I'm thinking the same thing; imagine living every day over again." Mai winced. Some had been heartbreaking. "But, I'm just happy we're here together now. I would not change one thing." He touched his scar, some reflex that had not faded with time's passage.

"Me too." Mai took one final look at the portrait, giving her fifteen year old self a smirk.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai doesn't like Omashu much.

  **Omashu**

The city rose up, layer after layer, like some grotesque wedding cake. Carved out of a mountain, sitting amongst other mountains, it was isolated and alone, _and_ Mai assumed, boring. She closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them again, hoping that her first glimpse might have been some error or illusion. But no, Omashu was the same on second look and on the third. She sighed and her mother shot her an exasperated glare. Mai had been sighing and mostly silent all the way from the Fire Nation. Tom-Tom made enough noise for the both of them anyway.

Her little brother, just over a year, happy in that way only babies and toddlers _can_ be, gurgled and cooed and drooled and clapped his hands and laughed. Doting on him, Mai's mother delighted in everything he did. When he soiled his diaper she was proud, as if the boy had accomplished something miraculous. Mai just wrinkled her nose in distaste and averted her eyes.

_Tom-Tom will be happy here. He's happy everywhere. And Mom is so wrapped up in him, she can't see anything else._

"It won't be that bad, Mai. Your father is governor. We'll be comfortable and well taken care of." The woman smiled, trying to impart some optimism to her daughter. "Just wait. You'll see."

"Right, because being stuck in a city with a bunch of Earth Kingdom people who hate us will be so much fun. And oh yeah, I don't know anyone and have no friends and nothing to do except toss my knives at things and read. Can we stay forever?"

Mai's mother ignored the sarcastic tirade. "Try to be happy for your father. This promotion is very important to him. Fire Lord Ozai trusts him with this responsibility. He has worked so hard, Mai."

The fifteen year old stared mutely out the window of the carriage. Her father's ambitions did not interest her. They were what pushed her into the background years earlier, so far into the background that she had almost vanished.

As they got closer to Omashu, sounds reached Mai's ears; the rush of delivery carts, merchants hawing their wares, animals squawking and bellowing. She hated it already. Capitol City was serene and calm not raucous.

Quietly she prepared herself for days shut in her room; book in hand, blades poking holes in the tapestries. She supposed it wouldn't be that much different from home; just colder. And there were always the nights, when fantasy and dreams ruled her mind, rather than cool logic. _They_ wouldn't change and for that she was grateful. Of course, she would never tell her mother that.


	16. Passion(less)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai reveals her true self only to Zuko.

  **Passion(less)**

"Is that what you and Zuko have been whispering about?" Princess Azula sneered and pointed at the charcoal drawing of Mai and Zuko that hung on the wall. It was one of the few decorative pieces in Mai's room. She didn't like frills and preferred a minimalistic sort of setting. Clutter impaired her thinking. "Did you have it done so you can remember what he looks like, you know, in case he leaves again?"

Azula deserved a smack for that or worse. She pranced about Mai's room as though it were her own; touching things that Mai did not want her to touch. The princess sat on the bed then and smirked at Mai while she ran her hand over the coverlet. She didn't need to say anything. Her meaning was obvious.

Mai bit back all the smart retorts that came to mind and kept her clenched hands hidden inside wide sleeves. Nothing would be gained by battling Azula now. The princess could have her fun and mock and hurt. Mai would continue to present her bored face. She would show no passion for anything. That would be like exposing all her vulnerabilities. And Azula was the best at taking advantage of those.

"Always helps to be prepared," she finally replied, her tone as dry as the soil after a long, hot Fire Nation summer. Mai glided to the window and stared across the street to the palace. Zuko was there, _somewhere,_ perhaps in his room moping, perhaps training, perhaps sitting by the pond contemplating the turtleducks. He wasn't with her. That was the point. His _sister_ was and she was a poor substitute.

"So Zuko spends a lot of time over here, doesn't he? He's always creeping across like some criminal. Geez, you might as well get married. This big house, you and Zuko alone; can't imagine what you get up to."

Mai turned back to Azula, keeping her face blank, offering nothing but a shrug. "Not much."

Irritated, the princess leapt up from the bed and headed toward the door. "Having a conversation with you is like talking to a corpse. I actually think the corpse might be livelier."

Mai shrugged again, secretly pleased. She watched as Azula left, stomping down the stairs and out the front door to her waiting palanquin. Before jerking the curtains shut she glared up at Mai's bedroom window. Cheekily, Mai gave her a wave.

"Thank Agni," the raven hair girl declared.

Not long after, still at her window, Mai spied the prince headed toward her house. Delicious warmth spread through her body. Her heart hammered hard inside her ribs. Her hands were unclenched now, open, waiting to hold and caress. She darted down the same stairs Azula had just used and yanked the door open, striking a casual pose on the spacious front porch.

"I thought you would never get here." Mai pretended indifference.

But both she and Zuko knew better.


	17. Quietude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai surrounds herself with quiet.

**_Part 17: Quietude_ **

Mai had always been a thinker, a subdued child who observed a situation before diving in. That's not to say she was averse to fun or minus a sense of humour. In fact, Mai could be quite mischievous. She simply couldn't see the point of talking if she really had nothing to say.

Quiet was one thing. Her parents appreciated that, thinking her demure. But they also wished they could prod Mai at will, when presented before guests or meeting fellow nobles unexpectedly, and have her spout charming phrases like some human fountain. They couldn't and she didn't. The girl stared down at her feet instead, stubborn, shy, enraged that she was trotted out like a prize animal rather than cherished as a daughter.

Her father shrugged off her behaviour and suggested that Mai make only a brief appearance during dinners and parties; a sweet smile and then off to her room for an early bed. Children need their rest after all, especially bright, active ones such as their daughter. That's what they would tell their guests. And these guests would nod agreeably while inside a certain curiosity bloomed. A bit of mystery never went amiss; anything to help Mai's father along on his path to high ranking government official, _anything_.

Mai was relieved to be shunted off to her private space. So she endured the few minutes bravely enough, cringing inside when adults patted her on the head or spoke down at her as though she were brainless. The chatter and laughter wafted lazily up the staircase and penetrated the barrier of Mai's door. She resented the noise, did not find it pleasant or soothing, even when her mother's tittering rose above that of the other ladies. She rolled her little eyes and grumbled something to herself before settling down with a book, pillows piled up around her, her own fortress.

Inside Mai lost herself in the story for awhile before putting down the book and closing her eyes. She imagined not a different future than the one her parents wanted for her, for _them_ , but that she had choice. That's all she wanted, really; recognition as an individual with individual needs and desires and skills and flaws. Mai was too young to do anything about her situation. She rebelled in her own small ways and each disapproving look was a victory.

She was perceptive enough to realize that despite their failings, her mother and father loved her and all their pushing and expectations were to ensure her some sort of idealized position in society; in other words, they hoped she would marry into a high ranking noble family and live a life very much like theirs. What she herself might want did not appear to matter. Her future was a blur, some misty unknown time and that both frightened and excited Mai.

But in her room and within herself, a quietude existed. It kept her strong and it kept her sane and she crafted it with care and precision. Inside that quietude, Mai had complete control. Inside that quietude, Mai was almost happy.


	18. Ripe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tired of Azula, a young Mai escapes to the palace kitchen and a very sympathetic cook.

_**Part 18: Ripe** _

Stained bright red, her fingers gave Mai away. She stuffed them inside her sleeves and bit her lip before giving the cook a sheepish smile.

Yakumo, a middle aged woman who had been a part of the palace staff for as far back as Mai could recall, patted her on the head and told her not to worry. "You eat all the berries you like, Mai. I won't tell if you won't." She thought for a moment, one flour dusted finger on her chin. "Why don't we bake a tart stuffed with berries?" Mai nodded approvingly. "And when it's done, you can share it with the prince. He likes these berries too." The girl lit up like fireworks on festival day, her nod vigorous this time. "You're not much for talking, are you?" Her smile indulgent and affectionate, Yakumo set about getting the rest of the ingredients and putting Mai to work.

~~~~0000~~~~

She'd escaped to the kitchen awhile earlier. Bored with Azula's war games and bossiness, Ty Lee's effervescence and the day in general, she'd feigned a need to use the bathroom. Wandering to the kitchen instead, drawn by the good smells and Yakumo's kindness, Mai discovered a bowlful of plump, ripe berries, her favorites. Unable to resist, she'd snatched a few, popping them into her mouth and biting down. Juice and flavor exploded on her tongue. Mai grabbed more and soon her fingers and lips wore the tell tale signs of berry eating.

Emerging from the massive, walk-in pantry, humming a cheerful tune, Yakumo had discovered the girl.

"Here, Mai, add the flour, a little bit at a time; like that, yes." She was patient, so much more patient than Mai's parents and the girl soaked up the woman's and the kitchen's warmth like parched ground did the rain.

They made the crust for the tart and added sugared berries and something to thicken it all up. Yakumo centred it in the wood fire oven and dusted capable hands off on her apron.

"We've got to keep a good eye on that tart. Think you can do that, Mai?"

"Yes," she replied with a slight smile.

"I thought so; I'm going to round up the prince." She leaned down close to Mai and grinned. "I know where he likes to hide during the day."

~~~~0000~~~~

Mai crouched in front of the oven and stared, taking Yakumo's words literally. Her pale skin turned pink from the heat. She wiped her forehead and suddenly craved a glass of chilled water. But before she got too uncomfortable, Yakumo returned.

"Did you find him?" Mai whispered the words, her raspy voice full of hope.

"I did. He's in the library now. You know where that is, right?"

"Yes."

"Well then, when the tart is done, I'll make you up a tray and you and the prince can enjoy." She put one hand on Mai's shoulder. "Are you fine with that? I mean, the princess won't mind? You don't need to get back?" A dark implication in the cook's words caused Mai to shudder a bit. Azula had been known to inflict pain upon those who displeased her.

Mai wondered briefly what repercussions Azula might decide upon if any. A trip to the bathroom had become a few hours away. Most likely, the princess would assume she'd headed home. Mai might not find out for days. An unexpected slap or push would remind her that Azula was in charge. But she didn't care. A chance to spend time with Zuko overrode any lingering worry about that. _Then_ she fretted about Zuko. Did the prince know that she was a part of the whole tart deal? Sighing, she picked at the hem of her tunic.

"He knows," Yakumo declared as though she could read the little girl's thoughts. "And he seemed quite pleased."

Soothed, Mai waited. She sat on a stool and swung her legs a bit. Finally, the fruit tart was done and cool enough to slice. The smell was divine and Mai couldn't help but lick her lips.

"All right; let's go." Yakumo accompanied her as far as the library door. She opened it for Mai and then stepped aside. "Good luck." She winked and patted Mai's head once more before retreating back down the corridor.

Mai spotted the prince and he spotted her and they both stared down at the marble floor. Taking little steps, Mai carried the tray to the table and set it down. Grateful not to have dropped anything, she let loose a sigh of relief.

"Hi, Mai." Zuko pulled a chair out for her, fumbling a bit. "It smells really good."

"I helped make it."

"Yakumo told me."

"She's nice."

"She is."

"Here." Mai put a plate in front of him and a glass of lemonade.

"You escaped Azula?"

Nodding, Mai arranged her own dishes and waited for Zuko to taste first. He shrugged and dug in.

"Oh, wow, it tastes great."

"I'm glad. Fruit tarts are my favorite, especially with these berries." The words flowed easier now. Zuko always made her feel comfortable and wanted, no matter the circumstances.

Go ahead, Mai," the prince urged.

Mai had to agree. It was the best fruit tart she had ever tasted. And the company made it all the better. Perhaps not all her days were doomed to be dull.


	19. Sulk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After her fight with Zuko during 'The Beach', Mai just wants to sulk.

**Part 19: Sulk**

What Mai really wanted was solitude, a lonely little bit of beach where she could sit and sulk. But Ty Lee stuck to her side like some adorable lost kitten and Azula strode ahead, military like, throwing glances over her shoulder to make certain the girls followed. The princess insisted upon finding some perfect spot and insisted even harder that the three of them sit around in the dark like normal friends might do; listening to the gentle rhythm of the waves, the calls of night creatures, the rise and fall of voices drifting down from Chan's party.

Mai was stuck with them and had to do her sulking under their scrutiny. It was not the same. And that irritated Mai even more. When Azula left after a few minutes, off to drag Zuko back from his brooding, melancholic journey down the sand, Mai stretched her upper body out, put her hands behind her head, and stared up at the blue black sky peppered with yellow dots of light. The rock was uncomfortable but she did not care. If anything, it seemed fitting, her discomfort. Releasing a gust of air, Mai went over the scene at Chan's place.

Sometimes Zuko infuriated her. Sometimes she wanted to throw every knife she owned at him, throw to hurt, maim and draw buckets of blood. He provoked reactions in her like no one else ever had. She smiled, even laughed. She fumed and worried. Her face was malleable in Zuko's presence. It shifted and changed contours. It revealed and illuminated her true self. Mai realized the value of _that_.

She was over it now, for the most part. Her own anger had died down, like neglected embers in a fire. And when Zuko approached with Azula, giving her that strange sidelong glance, her heart thawed even more. Mai looked back and managed a broken sort of 'hey'.

The prince ruined the moment. With his arms crossed he sneered at Mai, asking about her 'new boyfriend'. Mai's anger flared again and she turned away from Zuko, struggling to compose her face, rearrange everything that he had disturbed.

As so often Zuko did, too late he realized his misstep and tried to make things better. His voice soft and conciliatory now, he joined Mai on the rock and attempted to slide an arm about her shoulders, asking whether or not she was cold. She wanted his arm there, loved its gentle pressure, loved the fire that oozed from his skin. But she batted it away like she would an annoying pest.

And when Ty Lee spoke up, proclaiming her own coldness, Zuko left to make a fire. Mai allowed herself to submerge again, sinking into the comforting sulk. She would come back up when she was ready.


	20. Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai bonds with Iroh.

_**Part 20: Tea** _

The air bison let out a tremendous bellow before lifting up and off the ground, up into the sunset painted sky over Ba Sing Se. Mai watched from the balcony, one hand shielding her eyes, until the huge beast appeared smaller than that one annoying freckle on her shoulder.

She started a bit at seeing Iroh when she turned about to face the Jasmine Dragon.

"You should have gone with them." The old man examined Mai with shrewd amber eyes. "The fireworks must look spectacular from that high."

Mai dismissed his words. "I've seen plenty of fireworks." She tucked her hands into wide green sleeves and stared blankly at the stonework beneath her feet.

"Ah, all right then. Would you like a game of pai sho? Or perhaps I could show you how to make the perfect cup of tea."

Mai weighed the options. She'd had her fill of pai sho _and_ tea. But watching a master at work was always interesting. "Tea," she declared and gave Zuko's uncle the slightest of smiles.

"Tea it is." Iroh led the way to the kitchen at the back, chatting with exuberance about the shop and his expanding clientele and his experiments. The man loved his tea as much as Mai loved her blades.

Mai had to admit that the kitchen was impressive. Spacious and well organized, it contained everything Iroh could possibly require as owner and operator of the Jasmine Dragon. Huge pots for brewing gleamed in the lantern light. A neat row of jars sat atop the counter, each containing different tea leaves. Iroh explained that all tea came from one kind of plant, but underwent different aging processes to obtain their unique flavors and colours. And then there was tea you could brew from herbs. He dabbled in that too but mainly added herbs to tea leaves in different strengths and combinations, making his own special brews.

Those herbs were kept in pretty porcelain pots decorated with a painting of the plant in question. Mai pulled the lid off the jar of mint and then sniffed.

"Would you like to make a mint tea?"

She shrugged. "Sure, whatever."

"Fill that smaller kettle there with water."

Iroh lit the fire with one quick movement of his finger. Mai filled the kettle and put it on the stove.

"I find that mint goes well with white tea. Are you all right with that?"

"Sounds good."

"You're a woman of few words, aren't you?"

"Is there something wrong with that?" She fiddled with a jar, turning it this way and that before lining it up with the others once more.

"No, no, not at all; you and Zuko balance each other out well. He's happy, tired but happy and that's in large part to you."

"How do you know that?"

The water began to steam. Iroh pointed to the kettle and then the tea pot, indicating that she should rinse the pot first with warm water. Mai did so.

"Zuko looks at you like, well, like I looked at my wife all those years ago when we were first married."

"I'm hoping you loved your wife."

"More than anything, my dear; she was my light. And when she burned on that bier, a huge part of me burned with her." Mai blinked but said nothing. "And look at the group of lovely people he has now. It's the first time in his life that he's had friends. Oh, there goes the kettle."

They busied themselves making the tea and all talk of love and friendship ceased for a few minutes. But when they sat out front enjoying the tea and some moon cakes, the old former general began anew.

"I sense you might still be uncomfortable with Zuko's friends."

"You call them _his_ friends, not _ours_. Doesn't that say everything?"

"I suppose Zuko knew them first; but I think they like you just fine, Mai. And you were enjoying yourself too." He winked at Mai. "Don't deny it."

"Hmmmm, perhaps."

Her childhood had been devoid of friends, excepting Ty Lee and Zuko. Azula did not count. This idea of friends, an actual group of people who were interested in her and cared, was a new concept, one that made her slightly uncomfortable. Mai wasn't quite sure what to do with all that warmth and kindness.

"You and Zuko both are in the midst of many changes. It takes time to grow accustomed, Mai. But it will happen and one day soon these people will mean the world to you. I feel it."

"Weren't we supposed to be talking about tea?" Mai's tone was teasing but she got her point across. She wasn't ready to open herself up to Iroh or to Zuko's friends, the war heroes, the gang; not yet. Things shifted inside, slow and steady, tiny, incremental movements, pushing her toward a different existence, a freer one; but Mai would not rush this transformation.

"Talking about tea is like talking about life."

Mai could not resist an eye roll. "So when Zuko says you're obsessed with tea, he's _not_ exaggerating?"

Chuckling, Iroh reached across the table and patted Mai's hand. Mai allowed it and took a small amount of comfort from the old man's gesture. Not for the first time, _her_ uncle came to mind. Though he and Iroh were as disparate as the South Pole and the Fire Nation, both had been saviors of a sort, Iroh for Zuko and Katashi for her. Perhaps, she would be lucky enough to have a second savior.

"Obsession has such negative connotations; how about we say that I appreciate tea, its benefits and its wonders."

Mai shook her head. "You're obsessed." Humour sparkled in pale gold eyes. "I recognize the symptoms."

Outside, the fireworks began. Every thunderous bang was accompanied by a shower of colour visible through the shop's large windows.

"Come, Mai; bring your tea. We're watching the fireworks. There is so much to celebrate." He leaned in close and whispered, "And so much more for you and Zuko."

Protesting would take more energy than walking out to the balcony. So Mai went along with the plan, sipping her tea and staring up at the bursts of vivid reds and purples and greens. She supposed they were pleasant enough.

"I never get tired of fireworks; never." Iroh pointed upwards, laughing with simple joy.

The tea maker's laugh wove its way into Mai's fabric and she joined him, hers in low, throaty contrast to the sweet sound he made. When Zuko returned he left his group of friends and sought Mai out, finding her still with his uncle.

"Hey," he greeted her shyly. "You should have come."

Glancing at Iroh, Mai answered, "I had a perfectly good time right here." She reached for his hand and linked her fingers through his. Iroh took Mai's cup and scurried away, pleased to give her and Zuko some privacy. "Uncles are kind of amazing."

"Yeah," Zuko agreed.

She rested her head on his shoulder and just let her feeling of contentment be. There was plenty of time for worry and stress and work. Right now, at Iroh's tea shop, far from home, Mai had everything she wanted.


	21. Umbrella and Universe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As a child at the beach with her mother, Mai creates her own universe; it's better than her real world.

_**Part 21: Umbrella and Universe** _

Along the expanse of Ember Island's public beach, red umbrellas emerged from the sand like strange trees, all tilted backwards at just the right angle to provide optimum protection from the fierce Fire Nation sun. Crouching down at the water's edge, rooting around for shells and starfish, Mai glanced at her mother. The woman sat beneath one of the umbrellas, fretting, half her attention on Mai, the other half on herself. She adjusted beach wear only slightly skimpier than her usual robes and picked at the sand that coated her feet and threatened to continue its creeping journey upwards.

"Not too far, Mai."

At seven years old, the little girl already possessed an unhealthy dose of cynicism. "Whaddya care?" she whispered to herself before humming a favorite tune, something her uncle sang to her whenever he visited.

"Mai, I want you to come and sit under the umbrella for awhile. You're going to get burned."

She turned her back, pretended not to hear and continued to dig with tiny hands. When they grasped a shell prettier than any she'd seen before, a brief flash of delight touched her eyes. Cradling the shell in the palm of one hand, she trotted up the sand toward her mother.

"Look what I found!" She couldn't help her excitement and thrust her hand outward. She stared about then, her expression perplexed. "Where's Daddy?"

Her mother's face soured even more. "He's busy, Mai."

'Busy' was not much of an explanation but Mai knew that pushing would do no good. She put the shell in a bucket, safe from harm and sat for few minutes to satisfy her mother. Other children cavorted along the sand in pairs or bigger groups and a stab of loneliness penetrated the child. It was easy for all of them, easy to talk and laugh and feel comfortable with other children. Mai always felt slightly ill at ease, like a foot shoved into a shoe half a size too small. She pretended not to care, pretended to be bored. That disinterest had built a sturdy barrier between her and others.

Under the umbrella was a dull place to be. Mai began to squirm on the blanket and her mother shot her an irritated look.

"I'm bored."

"You're at the beach. How can you be bored? Look at the other children."

That was about the worst thing she could say to her daughter. Mai would not allow herself to cry, especially not here where others might see. She closed her eyes tight and breathed deep breaths, one hand clutching a bit of the scarlet blanket, the other buried in the sand. Once composed, she ventured away from the umbrella's shelter again. Keeping her back to the long stretch of sand and all those red umbrellas, she sat in shallow water, enjoying the feel of the warm waves breaking over her legs.

"You'll burn," she heard her mother exclaim once more. "You're so pale, Mai. You'll ruin your skin."

Mai settled down on her back. The water rolled in, up around her ears, blocking the sound of her mother out, blocking the sound of laughter and shrieks, blocking the cries of gulls, creating a little universe of her own.


	22. Vacuous

_**Part 22: Vacuous** _

Mai tapped her fingernails against the tabletop, a certain sign of her irritation.

"What does any of this have to do with me?"

Akira, Mai's mother, tapped her own rhythm right back. Her long scarlet nails looked like drops of blood against the dark wood of the table. "Her daughters are coming along as well, Mai. I expect you to entertain them."

The fourteen year old snorted before taking another bite of her dinner. "Entertain? Me?"

"Yes, Mai, you; it will be good practice for when you have your own household."

"I don't like them. I don't want to spend time with them. Why can't they just hang around with you and Lady Sadako?"

"Come on now, Mai; you're all young ladies. Surely you can find something that you have in common." Mai's father, Hoshi, gave her a stern look and Mai knew that she was doomed.

~~~~0000~~~~

Three days later, Lady Sadako along with her two daughters arrived at Mai's home for a visit. One year earlier the Sadako family had moved away to the Fire Nation's second most important city, one on the opposite side of the main island. Before the move, the two mothers spent a lot of time together, dragging their families into the relationship. There were dinners and teas and shopping expeditions, all of which Mai tried to avoid. If she couldn't, she made certain that the boredom she felt showed clearly with every word and every action. The Sadako girls made their feelings known as well. Neither liked Mai. Neither appreciated her sarcasm or her ennui or her caustic observations. Maybe one day their mothers would figure it all out; the girls wanted nothing to do with one another.

Mai's mother was nothing if not dogged in her desire to mold Mai into some younger version of herself and women like Lady Sadako. She pulled Mai into social situations with slippery, manipulative ease and Mai, with as much ease, slid back out. It was a battle that threatened to continue on into perpetuity or until Mai left home, whichever occurred first.

The women embraced while the girls hung back, Mai leaning against the wall, her slouch deliberate, almost antagonistic.

"Mai, come say hello to Izumi and Kumiko." Akira gestured viciously with her thumb, the movement hidden by her side, caught up in the rustling silk of her robes, so that only Mai could see.

With cat like leisure, Mai yawned and pulled away from the wall. "Hello." She made that one word sound like it was being dragged up from the very depths of her body, fighting all the way.

The sisters, one year apart, exchanged a look that said, 'See, Mother, I told you she's a bitch. I told you she hates us.'

"Hello," Izumi, the older girl answered. She smiled with false brightness and in her eyes Mai saw anger and resentment glint.

_At least she's smart enough to hate this too._

"Go on up to Mai's room, girls. Your mother and I are going to catch up over a nice cup of tea." Akira shooed them towards the staircase.

They all began the climb with reluctance. Furtive glances were given and received. Mai heard Lady Sadako say something about her still being 'sullen and aloof '. She smiled behind her hand, making sure to keep her pleasure secret.

Once behind the closed door of her room, without speaking any words, it was decided that the sisters would not interact with Mai and Mai need not interact with Izumi or Kumiko. Everyone was happy with the arrangement.

Perched on the edge of a settee, the sisters chatted about boys they might marry and the latest clothing styles and their hair and the next party they would attend. They spoke the same language her mother did, some foreign tongue Mai had only a passing familiarity with. And they had no interests beyond attracting the opposite sex and making a successful marriage, one in which love had no real place.

Mai wondered how much easier her days would be if she succumbed to the vacuous existence everyone deemed right and proper and appropriate. Izumi and Kumiko seemed content. Or perhaps they never thought of a life beyond the confines of parental and societal expectations.

Her parents would approve and just like that, Mai would be embraced as the good daughter who smiled when she should and looked forward to parties and showed interest in the young men of her class and put away her knives and refrained from bitter, cynical commentary and weary sighs and disinterested looks. They would show her off, expressions proud and smug. They would love her more.

But that kind of love did not interest Mai either. It was false, based on the _idea_ of a daughter rather than the flesh and blood girl they had made, with all her faults and abilities, her positives and her negatives, her _realness._

She sat on the bed and observed the girls, her glances surreptitious. They paid her no mind, so immersed were they in their sisterly talk. Mai picked at her nails and at the sheets and felt for the comforting shape of a holster and blade, disguised beneath layers of burgundy and black cloth. It was solid and sure, something she could depend upon, perhaps part of a future that would take her away from the emptiness she felt.

She got up and moved to the window, closing herself off from the animated talk. The girls sounded like no more than a faint breeze in the trees now.


	23. White

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At eight years old, Mai is confronted by grief and loss and death. She tries to understand.

_**Part 23, W: White** _

Did everyone keep a set of white robes somewhere in the back of their wardrobes, hidden, unseen, waiting and ready should a death occur in the family? They must, Mai figured. For how else could news of Grandfather's death arrive one minute, delivered by a suitably somber man carrying an impressive looking scroll, and seemingly the next, both her mother and father wore crisp, pure white?

"Mai, come." Her mother's tone offered no hope of resistance. Mai went. "The seamstress will be here shortly to fit you for mourning clothes." She sniffed then and dabbed at her eyes. "I expect you to cooperate."

"Yes, Mother."

Mai wondered at the grief on her mother's usually composed face. Her eyes were pink from weeping and her features were pinched, sort of sunken in like a melon when it begins to rot. Mai bit back any questions she had, sensing that now was not the right time. Probably, there wouldn't be a right time. She would observe and listen like she always did and figure things out for herself.

Her mother turned away then and wandered back down the stairs in a sort of daze. Her grief must be tied somehow to the past, for Mai's grandfather, her mother's father, never visited. Perhaps he had seen her as an infant, mute but for shrieks and gurgles and burps, easy to handle, easy to deal with. Perhaps he'd never seen Mai at all. Whatever the case, Mai had no ties to the man, but for his contribution to her physical being, the traces of _his_ blood that mingled and mixed with other traces to make her own.

The seamstress arrived, an old woman who had sewn countless robes and gowns in her lifetime. Her shrewd eyes skimmed over Mai, measuring, assessing.

"I've seen enough," she declared. "I can work here. It will save time."

A space was cleared. The seamstress set down a huge sewing kit. Inside was all the material she would need, reams and reams of white, scissors and needles and thread. She got to work, her head bent, only taking an occasional look at Mai.

It felt weird and disconcerting to be scrutinized so, evaluated and summed up as if she were nothing but a set of numbers. Uncomfortable, Mai wandered downstairs to the kitchen and scrounged about for something to eat. A cold supper had been laid out on the table, buffet style and the eight year old helped herself to a bit of this and a bit of that. She ate, not appreciating the tastes and textures, simply filling her stomach.

Mai left the kitchen then and wandered along the corridors. The house had never been a cheerful one filled with laughter but the quiet that settled over it now was surreal. Is that what death was then; quiet, the absence of something that was ephemeral to begin with? Walking further, a stack of biscuits in one hand, she reached the back of the house and the garden.

The sound of weeping reached her ears, the sound of regret and the sound of her father doing his best to provide comfort. It was an intimate moment and Mai felt like an intruder. She backed away with slow deliberation, away from the startling white of their mourning robes, white that seemed to hover in the growing darkness, ghostlike and otherworldly.

Some things were beyond her eight year old capacity to understand or decipher. Mai knew that her mother was sad about Grandfather's death. Did that mean she loved him once or still? Did that mean she harboured some sort of guilt? Did it mean that the idea of death rather than the person who died affected her mother so profoundly?

Confused, Mai crept back into the house and up the stairs. She wiped her hand off on her tunic, removing the dusting of biscuit crumbs. When she walked by the sitting room, the seamstress crooked a finger and beckoned her in.

"I'm not quite finished. But try this on."

Mai obeyed, not saying a word. She wondered how those piles of cloth could become something stitched and shaped so quickly. The woman fussed with the sleeves, sticking the odd pin here and there before declaring Mai free.

"Just the gold piping left to do; go tell your mother."

She hesitated. No, Mai would not go back out into the garden again. But she nodded anyway and left, sneaking up to her room and shutting the door. It was almost full dark now. Her furniture and bedding blended in like it should. The only thing that stood out was the white of the moon outside her window.


	24. Xenophobia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai, like all Fire Nation children, was taught from an early age that everyone else was inferior.

_**Part 24: Xenophobia** _

Mai sat at the back of the classroom, most of her attention focused on the wall of windows to her left. The teacher spoke about the March of Civilization and the war that continued on and on, leaving generations in its wake. She'd heard it all before, committed facts and dates and heroes to memory like a good student should. But none of it really meant anything. None of her family was personally involved in battle.

Only once had the war impacted her. Zuko's cousin Lu Ten died in the Earth Kingdom and his death shattered the prince. The ramifications of battle became clear when Mai witnessed the pain and sorrow in Zuko's eyes. But the war raged on and on.

The Fire Nation's desire for land and power and domination over the scrabbling scum of the other nations had no end, it seemed. And that's what they all were, those distant people she had never seen, people with green eyes and blue eyes and those who could bend earth and water, not fire; they were beneath her, a Fire Nation girl, beneath all those born on the blessed string of volcanic islands that made up her country. Well, that's what teachers and parents and other adults would have her believe. That's what other children thought too, their natural curiosity and openness tainted by adult prejudices.

Mai had met plenty of disappointing people right there in her own country. She couldn't imagine those of the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribes being any worse. But she never gave them any thought either. They were far away in countries she might never see. Their fates and their day to day struggles did not affect Mai.

"What did you learn in school today?" her mother asked when Mai walked in the front door, hungry and tired and desiring only solitude.

"Nothing important."

That was Mai's standard answer. And it always frustrated her mother. Wearing a smirk, Mai headed to the kitchen for a snack and then upstairs to her room where quiet was abundant.

~~~~0000~~~~

When her parents announced that they were moving to the Earth Kingdom, Omashu specifically, a newly conquered city that her father had been made governor of, Mai was taken aback. She was not sure how to react. Her life in the Fire Nation was dull. But it was familiar at least. Omashu, or New Ozai, promised nothing but the same life in a different location.

If possible, she would be even more isolated. Her father had already declared the city and its people off limits to Mai.

"I don't want you mingling with _them_."

"Dad, I don't mingle with anyone." She huffed with exasperation. "You mean I can't even go for a walk and look around? I can dress like an Earth Kingdom girl. It's not like they'll know who I am."

"Mai, you can take the girl out of the Fire Nation, but you can't take the Fire Nation out of the girl."

"Seriously; that's your best argument?"

"Who knows what they might do if they realized a Fire Nation noble was walking in their midst? They could attack."

Mai flaunted one of her blades. "They wouldn't get very far."

"They'll be envious and angry."

"Well, it is _their_ city. We don't really belong there, do we? We weren't invited." Mai was goading her father now, not focusing much on the import of her words.

"That's traitorous talk, young lady. And you had best stop right now. This world is ours for the taking. We're smarter, stronger, more advanced. The other nations should be thanking us for making their lives better." He was red in the face and puffed up full of his righteousness, a giant blowfish defending his ideals. "They're savages, most of them, unpredictable like animals." He shuddered. "I don't want you or your mother or your brother near them."

Mai couldn't win the argument, not against a man so convinced that New Ozai was a terrifying place filled with terrifying people ready to rip them into pieces or taint them with their stupidity and savagery. It was a ridiculous way to think, though Mai supposed resentment would be rampant and anger too.

"Let me stay home, then. I can manage here by myself."

_And I can walk around the city when I want to._

Her father's glare told her everything. That was unacceptable. Mai would be dragged off to New Ozai, trading one boring life for another.

~~~~0000~~~~

Some tiny part of Mai expected to see monsters, two-headed malevolent creatures perhaps, when their ship docked in the Earth Kingdom. Standing beside her mother, Mai observed the people, ordinary folk working hard, playing, laughing, staring at the new Fire Nation arrivals with fear, rage, disgust.

Feeling like a specimen, Mai hurried into the awaiting carriage, part of a caravan that would make the trek up into rugged mountains and the city of New Ozai. She stared out the window, a morose expression marring her pretty features. The trip took two days that seemed to stretch out forever.

It awed her at first, the city built on a mountaintop, no, _carved out_ of a mountaintop. Once inside New Ozai's gates, and moving up, up, toward the summit, along its winding streets, the people hiding in their homes, sneaking terrified peeks at the caravan, the Fire Nation soldiers marching along behind, their stomps the steady rhythm of tyranny, Mai's unease began to build.

"Guess they don't like us much," she drawled as a cabbage hurtled through the air, bouncing off the front of the carriage.

"They don't understand yet, Mai. In time, they'll come to realize that it's all for the best."

"All for the best," she echoed. "Whatever; I'm bored already."


	25. Yearn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mai years to see Zuko again.

_**Part 25: Yearn** _

"Look, Mai." Excited, Ty Lee pointed. In the vastness of the sky, a star tumbled with dizzying speed, down toward the earth. "Quick, make a wish."

Mai didn't believe in wishes, not really. What was the point of giving voice to one's deepest desires? What was the point of trying to pin them down with words or even with unspoken thoughts? Some wishes could never adequately be expressed. She shrugged and pretended for her friend's sake.

"Okay, did it." She should have known that Ty Lee would poke and pry without relenting.

"What did you wish for? Don't give me that look, Mai. It can't be that big a deal." She stood on her toes, put her face up close to Mai's and stared deep into the older girl's eyes. "I can guess if you won't tell me."

"Ty Lee, let it go. You should know by now that I'm not the confessional type."

"Well, _yeah_ , but we're friends." Implied was 'friends tell each other everything'. Mai had never been one to spew her thoughts and feelings. She preferred to keep them safe inside. That way no one could analyze or assume. But sometimes things unspoken had even more power.

"That's why you should know to leave me alone."

"Uh, you're so frustrating." Ty Lee threw her hands up and stalked away. She came back a few seconds later, unable to hold onto her anger. Mai watched the girl with wry amusement. "Fine; keep your wishes to yourself."

"Well, thanks, Ty Lee."

"I'll tell you what I wished for."

Mai gave her a small smile. "That's okay, Ty Lee. Maybe some things are better kept to yourself."

~~~~0000~~~~

Like other people, like other girls her age, Mai yearned for things. She hoped and she longed for life to open up and brighten and become something she could _live_ rather than just tolerate. She yearned for freedom from the yoke of ridiculous expectations. Though she would never admit it, Mai wanted her parents to be proud, to love without conditions.

More than anything else, though, Mai yearned to see Zuko again; a quick glimpse would be painful but at least she would know he was all right, surviving his banishment, enduring as he always did. The chances of that were so terribly small and that knowledge made her ache inside. And should that wish be realized, would seeing him be a disappointment? Did he want to see her? Would he even remember the raven haired girl who blushed when his name was mentioned, when he came near, the raven haired girl who found some sort of comfort in his presence and who tried to give that same feeling back?

Until she did meet Zuko once more, that would remain a mystery. Until then, Mai had nothing but yearning to keep her company.


	26. Zephyr

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze after a heat wave gives Mai and her mother something to bond over.

Part 26: Zephyr

Mai languished on her bed, nude but for her bindings. Even her holsters and knives were gone; she couldn't tolerate how the straps chafed her thighs and ankles and wrists. The sheets stuck to her skin, irritating the girl. She spread out her limbs and grumbled, complaining to herself about the excessive warmth. But her whines had yet to show any potency. For two weeks now, a heat wave unlike any she or her parents could recall, had suffocated her country, leaving everyone in a dull torpor, hardly able to function.

Mai enjoyed heat as much as the next Fire Nation citizen. It was in her blood, after all, the fire and the spark, bender or not. But this, this was extreme even for her. Curtains hung motionless, no sighing came from the huge trees in the back garden, animals that inhabited the city had hunkered down, silent, hiding. The insects were the only creatures that seemed unaffected. Their droning filled Mai's head.

"Oh, shut up," she called to the outside, wondering why she had bothered to throw the shutters back. The only thing streaming in was sunlight.

Hauling herself out of bed, she made her way to the window. About to slam the shutters closed once more, Mai hesitated. Something had changed. In the distance, there was movement in the trees, slight but definite.

"Could it be?" she wondered.

It traveled from the west, blowing across the Fire Nation, the zephyr, a sweet breeze, bringing relief to thousands of overheated citizens.

"Finally," Mai breathed. She leaned forward, allowing the wind to sweep thick black hair from her forehead, tickle her bare neck and the wisps of hair that had escaped her hasty upsweep.

A slow smile curved her lips. Heedless of what anyone might see, she stood in full view of the lumbering few on the street, begging the wind to caress her body. Mai slowly came to life, the agony of the past few weeks dropping away.

She didn't hear her mother barge in.

"Mai, Mai, do you feel it?" The woman, usually obsessed with propriety, gave Mai's state of near undress no mention. "Isn't it wonderful?" She joined her daughter at the window. "I feel like I've been dead for days and now….oh…." She leaned too and giggled like a child.

Her mother's giddiness took Mai aback, but she didn't show her surprise. It was a welcome change, this shared joy, even if it was only for a breeze.

"I feel it." Mai spoke softly.

Together, mother and daughter stared out across their city, urging the vigor back into it, hoping such a heat wave never occurred again, feeling a strange delight in being simply alive.


End file.
